🐾 “Muuum, he’s doing the face again!”

How We Accidentally Train Our Dogs to Nag Us

By Christian Pace

Let’s talk about nagging. Not yours — your dog’s.

You know the look. The one they give you when you’re trying to eat a sandwich in peace. The slow blink. The head tilt. The dramatic sigh. And if that doesn’t work, maybe a paw on your leg. Or a little whine. Or full-blown opera-level howling.

And here’s the kicker: it works. Because we taught them it does.

🧠 Welcome to the School of Accidental Reinforcement

Dogs are brilliant learners. They’re watching us all the time, taking notes. And when they discover that a certain behaviour gets them what they want — attention, food, a walk, your sandwich — they’ll do it again. And again. And again.

And then we try to be disciplined but it's short-lived. As they try harder and harder, we give in, rewarding even more intense persistent behaviour and make it persistent.

We don’t mean to reward the nagging. But we do. A little eye contact. A laugh. A “not now, buddy.” Even a sigh can be enough to reinforce the behaviour. To your dog, it’s all feedback. And if it eventually leads to a treat or a cuddle, well — lesson learned.

🍗 The Classic: Begging at the Table

It usually starts with one innocent moment. You drop a bit of chicken. Or you give them a crust because they’re being “so good.” Next thing you know, you’ve got a furry solicitor at every mealtime, staring into your soul.

And if you try to ignore it? They just try harder. Louder. Longer. More dramatic. Because persistence has paid off before.

🐶 Other Forms of Canine Nagging

• The Doorbell Dance: Barking at the door until you open it — even if no one’s there.

• The Lead Stare: Sitting by the leash and sighing until you cave.

• The Toy Drop: Repeatedly dropping a soggy tennis ball in your lap while you’re on a Zoom call.

• The Bed Shuffle: Pacing, whining, and nudging until you move over. (Yes, they want your pillow.)

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💡 So What Can You Do?

The good news is: if you accidentally trained it, you can intentionally un-train it. Here’s how:

• Ignore the nagging (completely — no eye contact, no talking, no sighing)

• Reward calm, quiet behaviour instead

• Be consistent — if you give in once, they’ll double down next time

• Pre-empt the need — feed before your dinner, walk before the whining starts

• Teach an alternative — like going to a mat or bed for a treat

🧘‍♀️ You’re Not a Bad Dog Parent

We’ve all done it. Even behaviourists. Especially behaviourists. The important thing is recognising the pattern and making small changes. Your dog isn’t being manipulative — they’re just being smart. And persistent. And adorable. Which, let’s be honest, makes it even harder to resist.

But with a bit of awareness and a lot of consistency, you can turn the volume down on the nagging — and build better habits for both of you.

Want help with a particularly persistent paw-tapper or biscuit beggar? I’m here for that. And no judgment — I’ve been trained by a few dogs myself.